Jeff - JO Buddies
Jeff
Week 1
We had been living together for a few years when I started secretly going to the gay beach. I went late in the day when most of the serious beach goers were already gone and the guys who remained were looking for sex. I wasn’t really looking for “real” sex…I was just looking for guys to beat off with…to watch and be watched.
Years earlier, while still in high school, my buddy Eric and I would get together and beat off. We never touched each other, we just watched. It started at the beach and happened there for a long time. Then we progressed to doing it in the car, at my house, at his house…we were teenagers who wanted to beat off constantly and wanted to do it together. Since I had already had a lengthly “hands-on” sexual relationship with my friend Rob, this watching relationship with Eric was very interesting. We openly discussed our cocks, our technique and our ejaculation. We called our time beating off together “a session” and worked at making them last as long as possible, ending by coming together, watching our cum fly.
So long after I had moved away from Eric and while I was living in a “committed” relationship, I was once again looking for a JO buddy, for “a session”. JO buddies were easy to find at the beach. Some were hot, others were not. Many became frustrated with me because they wanted to do more that beat off…I always refused because I was married. We would both just move on to the next guy. Fun times.
I started to travel for work so I graduated to sex clubs, bath houses, etc. Still just to beat off. I liked the sex clubs better because there were usually public areas where all of the masturbators could do their thing. And in public areas, there was less pressure for contact so I could beat off for as long as I wanted without having to address my “no contact” rule with anyone. That’s when I started to call what I was doing “putting on my show”. Because I had learned to control my orgasm so well during sessions with Eric, my shows could last for quite a long time. The audience I began with were rarely around for my finale. But that was fine because I was there to be seen by as many guys as possible. It became about being watched than watching. I was there to show off.
Jeff Week 2
Of course I felt guilty. I was in a committed, monogamous relationship. But as long as I didn’t have contact with anyone, I still considered myself monogamous, even though I never missed an opportunity to go to a sex venue. Every time I was told to schedule a business trip, I immediately felt a rush of excitement, my mind racing with thoughts of sex clubs, nude beaches, etc. And I planned my trips accordingly, making sure that I would have plenty of time to play.
I loved my shows. While being watched, I felt hot, popular, desired…quite the opposite of how I felt with my clothes on. And while I was in the moment, I allowed myself to think that it was me that was hot and wanted, not just my cock. It didn’t matter who was watching, I did my best to please them, showing different angles, letting them come in closer but never to touch. Sometimes so close that I could feel their breathe on my cock. I loved hearing their comments…”look at that”, “I’d love to feel that up my ass”, etc. At times, I actually felt proud. Throughout my show, I felt like I was in charge of the room and had everyone’s attention. I was the focus, I was the one they were talking about. Was it really me? No…it was my cock. But I didn’t allow that reality to intrude. I continued to enjoy it and feel the rush of showing off. It wasn’t until later, afterwards, that I would berate myself…telling myself that it was my cock that got the attention, not me. Well, of course it was, I was in a sex club…cock is the focus.
Cock is the focus. Can it ever be big enough?
Week 1
We had been living together for a few years when I started secretly going to the gay beach. I went late in the day when most of the serious beach goers were already gone and the guys who remained were looking for sex. I wasn’t really looking for “real” sex…I was just looking for guys to beat off with…to watch and be watched.
Years earlier, while still in high school, my buddy Eric and I would get together and beat off. We never touched each other, we just watched. It started at the beach and happened there for a long time. Then we progressed to doing it in the car, at my house, at his house…we were teenagers who wanted to beat off constantly and wanted to do it together. Since I had already had a lengthly “hands-on” sexual relationship with my friend Rob, this watching relationship with Eric was very interesting. We openly discussed our cocks, our technique and our ejaculation. We called our time beating off together “a session” and worked at making them last as long as possible, ending by coming together, watching our cum fly.
So long after I had moved away from Eric and while I was living in a “committed” relationship, I was once again looking for a JO buddy, for “a session”. JO buddies were easy to find at the beach. Some were hot, others were not. Many became frustrated with me because they wanted to do more that beat off…I always refused because I was married. We would both just move on to the next guy. Fun times.
I started to travel for work so I graduated to sex clubs, bath houses, etc. Still just to beat off. I liked the sex clubs better because there were usually public areas where all of the masturbators could do their thing. And in public areas, there was less pressure for contact so I could beat off for as long as I wanted without having to address my “no contact” rule with anyone. That’s when I started to call what I was doing “putting on my show”. Because I had learned to control my orgasm so well during sessions with Eric, my shows could last for quite a long time. The audience I began with were rarely around for my finale. But that was fine because I was there to be seen by as many guys as possible. It became about being watched than watching. I was there to show off.
Jeff Week 2
Of course I felt guilty. I was in a committed, monogamous relationship. But as long as I didn’t have contact with anyone, I still considered myself monogamous, even though I never missed an opportunity to go to a sex venue. Every time I was told to schedule a business trip, I immediately felt a rush of excitement, my mind racing with thoughts of sex clubs, nude beaches, etc. And I planned my trips accordingly, making sure that I would have plenty of time to play.
I loved my shows. While being watched, I felt hot, popular, desired…quite the opposite of how I felt with my clothes on. And while I was in the moment, I allowed myself to think that it was me that was hot and wanted, not just my cock. It didn’t matter who was watching, I did my best to please them, showing different angles, letting them come in closer but never to touch. Sometimes so close that I could feel their breathe on my cock. I loved hearing their comments…”look at that”, “I’d love to feel that up my ass”, etc. At times, I actually felt proud. Throughout my show, I felt like I was in charge of the room and had everyone’s attention. I was the focus, I was the one they were talking about. Was it really me? No…it was my cock. But I didn’t allow that reality to intrude. I continued to enjoy it and feel the rush of showing off. It wasn’t until later, afterwards, that I would berate myself…telling myself that it was my cock that got the attention, not me. Well, of course it was, I was in a sex club…cock is the focus.
Cock is the focus. Can it ever be big enough?
posted by LifeWriter at 11:04 PM
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