In the End (Jim)

Dad 11/22/2005

As I watched my Dad fight for his life and slowly lose the battle, month after month, I was struck by many, many things about his character. For one he never, ever, shirked the truth, no matter how bitter the reality of it. He sweated the details. I hide from it, forget. He held onto life with a tenacity, too, that I knew I’d never possess. I didn’t want to live that bad. He’d frequently bitterly bemoan that with what it cost him, this was not living. He was hardest on my Mom, the one he loved most. If anything brought him down, it was this. He also was faithfully spiritual, praying every night with family, something I had thought he’d just worn for appearances. His primary focus though was on wrapping things up well in all areas, with work, community, God and family.

So I’m left with, how had this man I’d despised so, become such a tower of strength, when undermined the most? I’d deeply misjudged him.

I watch my Mom every morning, stop by his grave site now, to say a few words, as she starts her day.